Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
