david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize