We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
