i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
