How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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