I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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