we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
