Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
