Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
