my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
