Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
