"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize