new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
