i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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