You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
