your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
