Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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