tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
