How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Randomize