he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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