I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
