Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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