How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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