So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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