That's intense
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Blood and glitter go together right?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
