I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
