Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
