His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
