Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Dicks are not precious.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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