I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
