so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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