you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Randomize
