so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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