your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My brain says no but my pants say off.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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