his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize