Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I am puke
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
