i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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