shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize