Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
You need a sexual gate keeper
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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