You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
