You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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