I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
