Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
