I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
