my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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