I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
