i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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