As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
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