My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
this will be a night to untag.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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