butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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