STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
