therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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